By Justin Brown

"Many immigrants say they have never been as cold as they have been since moving to New Zealand.

Our houses disappoint them enormously: damp rooms, weeping windows, Antarctic temperatures, dodgy heating systems and poor construction. Some experience wood-burner rage. Some (those who have built their own insulated pads) are sorted. Others manage to re-vamp weatherboard villas but, on the whole, most continue to freeze their nads off.

Recent arrivals didn't like being able to buy party pills in dairies. They don't like welfare spongers, having to get a WOF every six months and shorts that are too short on men. Television is awful; Sky is worse. Traffic lights take an age to turn green. Septic tanks, the health system, bullying in the workplace, hoons, P, the gangster culture, hard nosed Kiwi kids, racism and carrot, cheese, egg and beetroot sandwiches were among the gripes of newcomers. One Brit, who wrote [on an emigration forum]'having to park in someone's backyard and pay them $20 each time I watch the rugby at Eden Park' clearly didn't realise it's all part of the gamesday ritual.

Another blogger considered Auckland was King Kong in drag, while the tyranny of distance buggered many, with someone pointing out: 'It's not a sixty minute ferry ride to France.' Others swore the best red meat was exported, bemoaned car prices and our 'rollercoaster roads.' And perhaps the hardest feedback to swallow?

'Overall, New Zealand is a bit dull.'

Okay, that hurts; no one wants to be Belgium or Norway."

http://www.justinbrownbooks.com/mythnz.htm