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Thread: K.i.s.s.

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
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    Default K.i.s.s.

    After years of reading posts on here ... the best advice I can give is Keep it Simple ...

    NZ is not a third world country ... you dont have to stock up on underwear and small appliances, chocolate bars and soap, or just about anything else.

    Use your shipping budget to bring the stuff that you CANT replace. Things with sentimental value. Things of reasonable value (not your old sofa). Things which are typical of or remind you of your homeland (art, specific furniture)

    Dont waste your time trying to bring all sorts of electrical items (if coming from a 110v country) for which you will spend a fortune on adaptors and transformers. Have a garage sale and get new when you get here.

    DONT try to get around the customs and MAF rules by hiding things in your container and/or lying on your declaration. It can prove to be very costly. Besides WHY would you want to start your new life by trying to sabotage your new country??

    Assimilate. Settle. Adjust. If you have chosen to move to the other side of the world it must be for a good reason. For most of us it was for a better lifestyle. If life was perfect were you were (where you are waiting to leave) then why did you decide to make the move?
    It used to be a given that new immigrants embraced the language and the culture of their chosen country. After all that IS why they emigrated .. right? Because they saw life in teh new place as a step up?

    NZ isnt perfect . It is a young country with a frontier mentality.
    DIY and 'she'll be right' should be on the crest.
    People are independent and outspoken. They have seen the rest of the world and have come home happy to be here.

    immigrants who come here to whine and complain and try to change NZ into wherever they left make it hard for everyone else.
    Potential immigrants who spend months trying to work out how to break all the rules before they even leave .. should probably stay where they are

    NZ is a great place and the people are generally welcoming and helpful ... until you start trying to shove 'good old wherever' down their throats .. they are getting a bit fed up with that mindset.

    I met a man the other day who has been here 12 years. One of the first things he said to me was "Gosh i get so tired of my countrymen who whine about being here"
    I think that says it all

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    USA
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    Default

    All good advice. One finer point on the shipping of household goods though - you might indeed want to stock up on certain things/brands that are particularly dear to you - your favorite brand of underwear, for example, may not be available here, or it may be much more expensive than you might expect. Of course your small appliances,etc, are best to go to a yard sale if they are 110v - but I personally am finding other things much harder to replace due to availability and price. This is aimed especially at newer immigrants, of course - we have just passed the 6 month mark and haven't had time to adjust to the market conditions - so I am still getting used to the fact that my favorite brand of lipstick cost six times as much here (no, that's not an exaggeration). Higher prices mean you may just not be able to afford some things you would otherwise like to have - so it might be a good idea to bring a little extra of your favorite things!

    Also keep in mind that replacing furniture, etc can be quite costly - for us, after calculating the replacement cost, found it was cheaper to pay the extra shipping costs for a 40 foot container than it would have been to replace furniture, tools, clothing, and kitchenware and manchester!

    NZ is an amazing and wonderful place...but there is a price to be paid for moving here. Fortunately, it's well worth it!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
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    NZ to US to NZ. Opua
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    Default

    Good post. Thanks. I've seen the world and now I'm ready to come home.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Location
    Cambridge, Waikato
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    Default

    This all seems a bit simplistic to me. The emigration journey is a major life event and there are bound to problems with adjustment. Everyone's life situation is different, and it will work out for some and not for others. This forum gives people space to voice their frustrations with the process of settling, as well as express their happiness. Advice to just knuckle down and assimilate is probably unhelpful for those struggling with culture shock or severe homesickness.

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
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    Waikato
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    Default

    What does the second S stand for?

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
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    at the bottom of the top bit
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    3,405

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    sausage?

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
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    Auckland
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    3,697

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by canajanz View Post
    After years of reading posts on here ... the best advice I can give is Keep it Simple ...

    NZ is not a third world country ... you dont have to stock up on underwear and small appliances, chocolate bars and soap, or just about anything else.

    Use your shipping budget to bring the stuff that you CANT replace. Things with sentimental value. Things of reasonable value (not your old sofa). Things which are typical of or remind you of your homeland (art, specific furniture)

    Dont waste your time trying to bring all sorts of electrical items (if coming from a 110v country) for which you will spend a fortune on adaptors and transformers. Have a garage sale and get new when you get here.

    DONT try to get around the customs and MAF rules by hiding things in your container and/or lying on your declaration. It can prove to be very costly. Besides WHY would you want to start your new life by trying to sabotage your new country??

    Assimilate. Settle. Adjust. If you have chosen to move to the other side of the world it must be for a good reason. For most of us it was for a better lifestyle. If life was perfect were you were (where you are waiting to leave) then why did you decide to make the move?
    It used to be a given that new immigrants embraced the language and the culture of their chosen country. After all that IS why they emigrated .. right? Because they saw life in teh new place as a step up?

    NZ isnt perfect . It is a young country with a frontier mentality.
    DIY and 'she'll be right' should be on the crest.
    People are independent and outspoken. They have seen the rest of the world and have come home happy to be here.

    immigrants who come here to whine and complain and try to change NZ into wherever they left make it hard for everyone else.
    Potential immigrants who spend months trying to work out how to break all the rules before they even leave .. should probably stay where they are

    NZ is a great place and the people are generally welcoming and helpful ... until you start trying to shove 'good old wherever' down their throats .. they are getting a bit fed up with that mindset.

    I met a man the other day who has been here 12 years. One of the first things he said to me was "Gosh i get so tired of my countrymen who whine about being here"
    I think that says it all
    Apart from the selective words highlighted in bold, rest of the post is either not applicable or without any weight-age. There are certainly some positives and of'course negatives in life over here but that doesn't mean that anyone can start patronizing that "oh you have to crawl on the floor and accept everything outright". Sorry! but we all have emigrated here with certain credentials and after putting a lot of things on stake, there are bound to be some expectations, if everything was fine with bullock carts then why did anyone ever thought of inventing a motor carriage?? Unless people have the fire inside to question and address what is not right, there can never be any improvements, people from outside this box will definitely have new approach, ideas and ways. I do stock up my Jockeys, River Island shirts, gym supplements, Xbox games etc without any regrets.

    Again there is some sort of uneasiness within local crowd here as well, an example from last year: I was walking around doing some shopping with my wife and she spotted one white van with a local guy driving (sorry I really don't want to point out country of origin of the driver) who threw water from a bottle towards my side, come'on I was walking miles away from the road, looking at the shops and didn't even disturb a fly along my path (having said that, I stand 6 ft tall, been doing body building since 15 yrs...as OH & teen daughter put it in very nice words "I just look way smarter than them & it was pure jealousy")...that day changed my entire perception and I started to look at my Cosmic Utopia with much wider lens & came across so many similar circumstances (people have the tendency to point fingers, sabotage, sometimes rude etc etc)

    As an immigrant, do I want this to happen to anyone else...NO! Do I want to change this, YES!! On a lighter note, a NZ born colleague of mine said that NZ is the most developed 3rd world country - TBH I actually didn't take it as a joke as well because I moved here after a very long drill & investing life long savings in the process.

    Coming back to the kiss, yes I want to K.I.S (and peaceful as well) but if I'm taken for granted then the whole KISS becomes 1994 classic audio album. People have as much right to "not like" certain aspects of NZ as they might like other things in life (or NZ itself).

    p.s. this just my experience & personal thoughts and it might vary by some light years from actual facts.
    Last edited by Sun777; 13th February 2012 at 10:16 PM. Reason: Fine print

  8. #8
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    May 2009
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    Blenheim
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    I treid to rep you, sun, but was allowed......!
    Anyway, I am mostly on your side here, of course everyone is allowed to not like things, it gets a bit more complicated if you mostly don't like things and always compare with where you come from, in my opinion.

    Anyway, I hope you won't have many more unpleasant experiences like the one you described, I am aware that 'blending in with the locals' appearance- wise makes some things easier.

  9. #9
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    California to Tasman Bay
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    I disagree with almost everything you have said! Oh well, we all have different experiences.

    I would say, BRING EVERYTHING YOU CAN! Replacing things is very expensive here and many families won't be able to afford to replace much. We researched the cost of replacing our furniture, mattresses etc and it was cheaper to send our stuff in a 20 foot container than to replace just our mattresses of the same quality. Many North American appliances have 110-240 capability and work here with a plug adapter. Bring those things. Not everywhere in NZ is a great place for everyone. I didn't enjoy living in Blenheim and it made me second guess my entire move. Many kiwis haven't even traveled around NZ let alone outside of the country. A lot of NZers can be quite parochial about the specific place they live. That often makes it difficult for kiwis returning from living overseas. My husband felt like a man without a place for a while. When he first returned, he wasn't kiwi enough for some people and he NEVER talks about the USA.

    I'll admit the word "assimilation" makes me twitch so everything I'm about to say is definitely a response to that word. Yes, embrace the new culture but how could you forget the culture that formed you and made you who you are? For example, I can't help that I find it cold here. When someone comments about how hot it is and asks me why I'm wearing a sweatshirt, I don't feel scared to say, "This weather is cold to me because of where I'm originally from." I'm not complaining about the weather; I'm stating a fact as to why I'm wearing a sweater. I do agree with your point that it doesn't make much sense to try to turn NZ into where you came from but I'm not going to hide that I'm Californian and it informs my world view. My brother in law hasn't lived in England in 20 years but he often talks about where he grew up. It helps our family understand him better when he shares his experiences. We can't pretend we don't have a different perspective. I think immigrants make comparisons as a way to figure out the place they are living. We talk about differences to figure out if they are differences of place, culture, or both. Sometimes they aren't as different as they seem and sometimes we've seriously miscalculated what something means. In my opinion, silencing that natural inquisitive comparison in the name of assimilation is to isolate your authentic self. I agree that complaining about how NZ is not like your home country isn't productive. However, comparisons or mentioning another country often is interpreted as "complaining".

    Also, there is nothing wrong with someone wanting to right a wrong in their society when they see one whether they are an immigrant or not. It marginalizes immigrants when you say, "You can't point out something wrong with our society, you are an outsider." And that is the limitation of assimilation. It means to pretend you are something you are not. It means trying to fit in so much that you never reference your own life experience. Yes, NZers have a right to have their society be different than the one I come from but when do I earn the right to point out when something is wrong? When does my assimilation mean my voice can be heard instead of dismissed? The answer is never. Assimilation for an immigrant means to never truly be part of society because your "otherness" keeps you from fully participating in bettering that society. The only choice is to become integrated into that society. Integration means sometimes I will notice that something is wrong in NZ and I'm not ashamed that my life experience and reference is from another place. I am a part of NZ society AND I have a history that is outside of NZ society.

    My son is 6 years old and half American. When we lived in the states we cultivated his half Kiwi identity. His "Grandma and Poppa Kiwi" sent him kiwiana. He's grown up with buzzy bee, marmite and watching rugby. His dad has made sure he knows what NZ is, what it means to be a Kiwi, and he's been encouraged to be proud to have a connection with NZ. Not one person I knew, family, friend or acquaintance, in the States questioned or was offended by that. They loved it. I don't want him to lose his connection to the USA just because he's far away and I certainly don't want him to be ashamed to be American. My 3 year old daughter won't remember the USA but I want to unabashedly cultivate her connection to her American roots just as we did for my son in the reverse.

    I don't need the burden of the idea that "immigrants that complain make it harder for everyone else". I am happy to live here. I love NZ. But I don't feel that my children and I need to give up being American in order to get along. I'm not demanding anything different than being able to embrace my American identity in the same way that kiwis embrace their NZ identity when they live in California. That is a challenge here. Any American who intends to move here needs to know about that challenge. No, it's not the end of the world or the most difficult thing I've ever faced, but it is a real challenge.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sun777 View Post
    Coming back to the kiss, yes I want to K.I.S (and peaceful as well) but if I'm taken for granted then the whole KISS becomes 1994 classic audio album. People have as much right to "not like" certain aspects of NZ as they might like other things in life (or NZ itself).
    LOL. Well said. The last thing you want to become is Garth Brooks covering mediocre 70's rock.

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