Leaving family behind

[janeyo]

Hi.
I feel for you too. We will have been living here 2 years in December and I have really struggled leaving family behind. I had a baby back in March and my sister also had a baby in April (she's in the UK, we were from Manchester too) I have found it extremely difficult without family support and seeing how much support my sister has around her. I have made some really great friends but still find it so hard without my family. I know it is probably going to be a much better life for my kids if I can ride it out but some days I just feel so down I just want to return to the UK. It's such a tough decision and I just feel so torn with it. I do use Skype regularly which does help, just have to watch the time difference.
Good luck with your decision.

[manckiwi]

Hi Janeyo

I can totally relate to how you are feeling, and being so torn; I am constantly feeling like that about where I want to be, as for me there are pros and cons of both countries. If it's any consolation, when I first arrived in NZ several years ago, it took me around 18 months to 2 years to settle properly and after that I realised I didn't really miss the UK anymore. Before that, all I wanted was my old life back in the UK. (If I move back again in January I'm prepared for it taking me a while to settle again). Perhaps it's worth giving it another 6 months and then reviewing how you feel then? If you're still finding it really difficult then there is no shame in returning to the UK; living in NZ isn't for everyone and it seems pointless to carry on doing something forever that is making you unhappy. I realise it's difficult if your husband is so settled though. Also I'm not sure of your reasons for moving initially, and how you felt about living in Manchester, but don't forget how grey it is here -it's been a terrible summer! I think it's been the final straw for me!

[janeyo]

It is such a tough decision. I don't miss the UK it's just the people for me. We did make a trip back in July as I thought that might help me to remember why we left Manchester. First week was tough, traffic, grey skies and everywhere so busy but then after a week I got used to it again and just loved being back with our family. I have decided to give it another year and then make a decision. Don't want to carry on being unhappy but don't want to go back and regret it.
The weather here is so much better and it is such a beautiful place. just a shame you can't bring everyone with you.

[manckiwi]

It is tough. I hope things improve for you over the next year and good luck with whatever you decide.

[janeyo]

Thank you. Good luck to you too with your decision.